Friday, May 13, 2011

So yesterday I had a chat with a naked lady....



After spending 23 years in Bahrain I've come to expect women to be more clothed than "normal"...as in seeing arms or legs was very rare there in the early days...now things are more relaxed and the expat community are fairly free to wear what they want...within reason. Besides the amount of skin covered up in the public sphere...the amount we see in the private (home, friends house etc) is generally almost the same as in the street. Your not likely to catch more than the usually accepted amount of skin even when inside and away from the prying eyes of the public (men).


I got used to that and funny enough when I came back to the states I was immediately blown away with what passes for being dressed while out in public these days. I've seen some women who apparently didnt finish getting dressed before leaving home...maybe they had an emergency...at Walmart...and thus left most of it laying on the bed. Or something (men too but generally it's the women whose state of undress is their fashion). As with all things...you get used to it.


Yesterday in college I entered the girl's changing room for the first time in the 3 semesters I've been attending this college. The dressing and shower rooms are split in two with the shower area having a small dressing area as well. I was chatting to my fellow class student when around the corner came one of the college instructors stark naked...coming from the shower area...not so much as a wet rag to hide the strategic bits.


Now I'm not a prude or anything...Ive seen naked before...but here is my beef with this. I grant you that it is a shower/changing room set up. I grant you that your likely to see some nudity etc...people are in a hurry and shit happens. What I dont get it...for those who choose to walk around stark naked...why do you assume the rest of us are ok with seeing you in such a state?


In other words, your "right" to be naked supercedes our right not to see you naked? I dont mind seeing women naked (or men for that matter)...the human body is amazing in its many forms...what I do mind is when someone takes away my right to choose whom I see naked. The girl's locker room was set up in such a way that she (or anyone) could easily dress in the same area they showered in. In other words, there was no need for her to parade around naked...so why force the rest of us to see her that way?


Now I know someone will get on here and say...well you dont have to go in the shower rooms if your afraid or upset to see someone completely naked. Your right...I dont have too...but what has that got to do with anything? Even inside the shower room why cant a certain amount of modesty be expected? Just because we are all women does that mean all the women in there are quite fine with complete nudity...just because you love being naked does that mean everyone around you loves for you to be naked too?


Anyhow, it irritated me...maybe Im oldschool....but I feel like I should be able to choose whom I see naked...and unless you are fully aware that everyone around you is fine with seeing your saggy bits and untrimmed glory...then maybe you should grab a towel and keep your goods to yourself?


Just a thought.


18 comments:

Lynn said...

I'm curious what the showers in the gyms in Bahrain are like?

Our gym has private showers for those who are to modest to shower in the open where the majority of the shower heads are.

As for those who don't want to see another naked person,prepare yourself and lower your gaze, I suppose. I put a towel around myself after showering but then I have to get dressed right out there in the open. I can usually manage so that I am not naked in front of someone but I do see people that seem to think nothing of it but they don't force me to look at them. Not even the ones that INSIST on talking to me while they are dressing or undressing. Most people kind of turn their backs if another person is at their locker in the same vicinity.

coolred38 said...

Lowering your eyes is fine...turning your back is fine...avoiding looking at the person is fine...but why am I the one that has to take all the defensive actions in this case. If there is a place you can shower AND change without having to come out into the general changing area..why not use it? And coming out with a towel on and getting into your clothes from there is not the same as just waltzing around stark naked cause you cant be bothered to wrap a towel around you...that kind of naked.

Lynn said...

Yeah,I know but I think that people don't think that way so much. I think that they are thinking about their own comfort more than yours. They are probably assuming that if you didn't want to see them you would avert your gaze. But I would really like to know how the women's showers in a gym in Bahrain would be.

Do you think that your request here is really any different than why some believe in hijab is necessary to protect the men from lusting or whatever?

Angel Darling said...

This is one reason (among many) why I don't shower at the gym. I don't want to see other people's "goods" (mostly because I've wanted to laugh histerically at times). :-)

marianna68 said...

When I was in the military (active duty) I hated showering with other women because I am very modest however I knew I had to deal with it. I did see women who paraded around after the shower like they were in their own home. THAT bothered me. I don't want to see everything God gave you. I remember in the reserves I was at Fort McCoy and we were in these WWII type of barracks and this woman walks out of the shower area STARK NAKED into the common area where we slept. I was like ???? really? Where's your towel. I quickly turned the other way but was aghast at her lack of modesty.

chocolate.6666 said...

marianne...I was in the military as well and I remember my first communal shower with 50 naked women...felt like there was NO place I could safely look...lol. But the military leaves no time for delicacies so eventually you look at nothing and get on with it.

And that really is my beef...if there is a place for you to enjoy your naked glory without parading in front of everyone else...why not stay in that area?

coolred38 said...

Aaaannnnd that's me commenting up there...my sons account was logged on and didnt notice. oops.

Suroor said...

Can't disagree with you!

almostclever said...

LOL, for me I don't mind if other women do it, but I must admit I feel a bit shy doing it myself. I've sat in the sauna with 4 naked women while I had on my running pants and sports bra.

I think I was the odd one in that situation. lol

Helene said...

This is a thoroughly mean spirited blog entry. I'd sort of like to respond to it, and have thought about it. But I've come to the conclusion that I don't want to be infected by the state of mind that produced it.

So instead, sorry you're having such a difficult experience in a woman's locker room.

chocolate.6666 said...

Helene...how is it mean spirited? Seriously? Im just curious as to why women in the locker room feel they can walk around naked...when there is clearly a spot for dressing..and even if u want to dress in the general locker room area...why not wear a towel to your locker and then drop the towel and dress? I have NO issue with BEING naked...I just wonder about walking around naked without wondering if anyone else has an issue with your nakedness.

Just questions...I dont ask them with a sense of mean spirit...if you read that into it than that is your personal opinion.

chocolate.6666 said...

Well hell...that's my son's account again up there. Need to check before I hit the send I guess. grrrr!

Coolred

oby said...

kind of reminds me (in reverse) about the argument for the veil...the right to see someones face vs the right to cover up. I guess it depends on the "culture" of the club one attends?? What is considered normal?

Anonymous said...

Just be glad you're straight. I'm not trying to be flippant here. Let's say that I've had a few times (not many thank God) when the only showers available were communal, and believe me... I've counted my blessings then: thank You God that I am blind without glasses :)

Anonymous said...

I think tolerance of the bodies of others is connected to tolerance of one's own body.

You are not required to 'like' or 'dislike'. Simply tolerate. The mind may chatter: practice ignoring it.

Locker rooms are for changing between a clothed and naked state. Practicing tolerance in this way makes that less anxiety producing.

Anonymous said...

Who said coolred was straight? You are gay arnt u red?

coolred38 said...

Im not sure what being straight or gay has to do with seeing nudity you didnt ask to see.

If I were gay (lesbian) then it seems I wouldnt mind seeing some lovely naked female flesh strolling around....but then again...I dont actually like seeing naked men strolling around either...leave a little bit to the imagination would ya.

btw Im not sure what I have written on this blog at anytime that would indicate I am gay...soooo what is the purpose of that comment?

Nope...not gay...but if I were it would not change my thoughts in the post.

Anonymous said...

This is common in the men's locker room. In fact, we don't even have shower curtains, but the open, communal showers. I enjoy swimming on my lunch hour at the local college pool; so one has to get over being naked and seeing naked or just stop working-out.